Soccercism!

***

I must admit, Brazil got me worried for a minute there with their lackluster performance in their first two games. But hey, i've been busy convincing others (and myself) that it's all in the game plan. Yeah, and that they wouldn't want their rivals to read their game before the time when it matters most came. The plan is to lead them on a different direction and when they meet you, wham!! They won't have an idea what hit them... the hints have been coming out from magical Robinho and legendary Ronaldo. Anyway, above that, this is one team that has scores and scores of legendary playaz, coaches and wins behind them. They have not come to this level by chance and to even think about dismissing them with a wimp of wishful thinkin' that they won't cut it is heresy. You can be forgiven if you do that to other teams notably France, USA, Ecuador etc.

So i heard people go on and on about Ronaldo (poor guy, i was also starting to really doubt his ability to perform) but he came back in style - 2 goals to drown the Rising Suns and equal Gerd Muller as the leading FIFA World Cup goalscorer of all time with an impressive 14 goals. Talk about silencing the critics.

My bone of contention is the shifting of goal posts by some "fans" now that clarity begins to embrace the game. The solids have gone thru and the others gone home. For some people (namely Czech fans), it was a bitter pill to swallow. They fervently claimed this was Czech's year to take the cup home. Alas! Now one of my gud buddies seeing his team leaving for Prague suddenly became a Ghanaian supporter. Undoubtedly, the Black Stars have had a gud run in this tournament, but drawn against the Selecao in the elimination stage would be their true test. So he asks me where my loyalty will lie then - coz to him, am a sellout for not supporting "Africa". My loyalty will lie with the same team i started with, win or lose (and lose is a scarce verb in our vocab). I mean, it's so convenient to become a "real" African when situations favour you (or not). It's easier to be "identified" as one of us/them when all along you've been out there..... Am curious to see where he'll jump next if the Black Stars pack back to Accra.

At the end, its just a game. Am having alot of fun with him on this one, i think once Ghana get booted with a scoreline of 6 - 1, then he'll come back to his senses. That scoreline is not hyperbolic, its as realistic as it gets. I mean, Ronaldo has to betta Muller's record, Robinho, Adriano and Kaka will be eyeing the Golden Boot and their underdog opponent despite putting up a brave fight, will be meeting them for the 1st time. Ouch, can't wait!!!

As other people say, it ain't over until the Fat Boy scores!!

Portfolio1

As i said in kujianika, putting up some of my wax here for props, barbs and comments.


This piece is a birthday card; the client's brief was "Make it Pink and Black!" That was it. You got to love client's really truncated instructions and huge anticipation for the ultimate design. Reconciling the two can be a designer's nightmare.... and very often, bliss!

Ma3 za Nai

***
Grew up with them. Running and rode around in them. Loved them. They inspired us with brighter flashier lights, UV and all inside. Design catapulted to the extra plane, creavity forged with madness. Created crazier stikaz and louder muzik to mentally indulge wateja when they diverted their minds from the troubles of this world, on their way home. Talkin' about Nairobi's Matatus.

Say What?

the art of thinking before saying

I don't know when i first got fascinated with what people say or how they say it, and became obsessed with the double meanings, puns and absurdities of those words and phrases. All i know is that i somehow began appreciating and enjoying the twisted meanings or their implied even in situations where the other party was dead serious (read meetings). I find myself instantly quippin' on someone's comment then moments later realize juz how cheeky or "punny" my own statement came out. What i love though is when that sort of quip comes from the other person.

Am busy discussing The Apprentice with an Acquaintance and she innocently quips "Oh, have you watched the new one with that virgin guy?" Well, here is when my brain overworks for a few milliseconds and i go like "Which virgin guy?" My mind is already laughing then it translates the same to my face when i see her face cringing with what i think is embarrassment-cum-unbelief! It then almost instantaneously hits her how corny her double-meaning comment was.

More intriguing however is when someone tried convincing how Islam was "inspired" by the devil. Since i try to be liberal (try here means am not), and believe my brain is for thinking with, i entertain the thought so that we can both somehow reach some form of logical conclusion on the reality of things. Think about it for a minute. Or two. Picture the devo tellin' jamaz to pray to One Great GOD. Picture if you will, him commanding "his followers" to shun & despise him and on top of it avoid anything evil - talk about shooting oneself on the foot! Now the trail of thought has really got me thinking. Why would satan inspire so much righteousness, love & humility to parents, helping the poor, preach peace and kindness to neighbours and your fellow humans? Mmhh, something wrong in this circuitry. Ask me another, my mind can no longer comprehend nor synthesize the thought so i drop it while laughing at its audacity. I think we should give some credit to lucifer for shrewdness - i mean he's been around so long, if he went that way, i think he'd prefer suicide instead!

I guess sometimes everyone says stuff without pausing to put a thought into it and that's ok, that's what makes the human experience juicier. Spontaneity and outrage! One thing i put a check on though is coming up with quotable quotes like these in front of a whole crowd or betta yet on national tv!! I'd rather spend a few more seconds thinking about what am about to say than sayin' it wrongly, regrettin' and living with its repercussions sometimes for the longest period.

Oh, by the way, that Virgin guy we talked about earlier is Richard Branson! Don't get caught pants down with comments like this (pun very much intended)!!

Samba Tyme!!

The Art of Soccer

Once every four years, i transform to embrace a form of art that has its galleries filled with pomp, fireworks, lively parades and anthems. It is the only time I convert to a true football fanatic as million others across our blue globe. And without even blogging a lot, let me say straight up, as a matter-of-factly, of course, Brazil will win this year’s WorldCup in Germany. Nimetangaza msimamo!!! No bets please, but if I was to accept any, I’d bet my first ever Q&Q watch, my entire Intro & Gerald Levert collection, the Chinese lantern and top it with a golden engraved bracelet my first love gave me. That’s how much trust I have in the Seleção. God-willing, this time round we will witness unreal, unmatched and raw talent explode from Munich to Dortmund. We will be thrilled and amazed by the greatest show on earth, but the ecstasy will double every time the yellow, green and blue regally match into a match. We will jot down score for score and reach fever pitch when the month culminates with the raising of the coveted goldware by Cafu.

If you’re still skeptical, here are a few facts that might tilt you. Brazil has a FIFA world ranking of number one. They qualified for Germany through a 9-7-2 record, and although Argentina had the same, the Samba Kings had a greater goal differential. They are the only team to appear at all 18 tournaments since 1930 and won it five times in 1958, '62, '70, '94 and 2002. They were runners-up in '50 and '98; third place in '38, '78; fourth place in '74. A record to behold in itself, but here’s the shocker. This year’s squad list is sweeter than candy and flows like a nursery rhyme. I bet even the germans themselves will be supporting Brasil!!

Cafu, Lúcio, Roque Júnior, Roberto Carlos, Emerson, Zé Roberto, Kaká, Ronaldinho (the Emperor), Ronaldo, Adriano.

The list is so spiced up that even a great player like Robinho, taunted by Pelé to take his legendary place, is not among the starting line-up!! That should be enuff reason to be afraid, be very afraid.

It's about time we add another star to our emblem. The Sixth Star!!

June 13th, 2100hrs, Berlin, Germany: Croatia here we come! Let the samba begin!!

Weed Bid

Ditch cig, smoke weed

i must confess, this hiatus business is quite cool. i managed to recharge, major!!! And not to mention reflect, revive, reconnect and reorganize. over this period of "separation", i missed someone greatly, i think she was busy not missing me that much from the shores of some lake in burundi. well i did my "retaliation" by going to mombasa and the shores of the indian ocean. and the breeze as usual caressed my face with whispers of peace and relaxation. and i got rained on the beach, dripping wet for hours. juz have to love nature.

this period also brought me enuff insights and unusual drama. the one that was most amusing and one that needs a barb to the government for major "upumbavu" is the new law on cigarette smoking. now, we are made to believe that this piece of shitty legislation (for lack of a betta term) actually went through some intellegent discussion before it was tabled as a legal notice. for crying out loud, we know we have really dumb ineffective elements in the so-called government of national unity but we don't need to be affected by their ineptitude and desolate selfish thoughts. come to think of it, that sounds ironical - we just can't avoid it - we voted them in!

so they bring forth this "thought out" plan to eradicate smoking in public places. first, public places here means wherever people are; buses, matatus, schools, offices, govt buildings, markets, cybers, restrooms, residential etc, i think you get the idea. Virtually EVERYWHERE!!! that's all good with me, as long as i have no one to regulate what i do in between the four confines of my home. then comes the silliest legal loophole since the partial lifting of the ban on ivory trade. they propose that if you're caught smoking cigarettes the fine is Kshs. 50,000 or a jail term of no more than 6 months. now if you're caught smoking weed, the fine is Kshs. 10,000 or a jail term of no more than 3 months. Cute. I think my once hazy decision is now quite clear.

logically, am all for the bid to smoke more weed since its cheaper to ehhhh, and if ur caught anyway, its still cheaper to bail out and if you're unable to pay it, its sentence is lower. Heck, i love this government!! if they continue like this, they'll get re-jected!!! The Ministry of Health should anyway know betta - jamaz are rushing back to herbals and damn, this is The HERB!!!

I think they should be more creative and set up a commission on Weed Reinstatement & Related Affairs. Then they transform some of those useless EPZ's that help no locals to become weed packaging outlets. This should give us a new cash crop and ease overdependence on coffee and tea, and the much needed funds for campaigning next year's elections. Heck, we can even have a Weed Party of Kenya, like today's launch of narc kenya, the "non-tribal" party. that should spice up the political scene kidogo, literally!! Come up with a catchy tagline like "Friends that smoke trees together..... aah, no a friend with Weed is a friend in Deed"!! i'll design the logo and paraphernalia pro bono!! i already have ideas.......

and back to the fines. if i buy a cig for Ksh. 1, and am caught smoking it, where the !$^&#@ do u suppose i'll raise 50,000 to pay the bail? even betta, if that cop is willing to settle "out of court" with me, won't it make a new outlet for bribery. damn, i think they were right talkin' about creating new jobs. 500,000 of them!! They must be seriously smoking something else!!!